Working On It
The constant...
(0% AI)
There is always going to be something new around the corner: a new way to look at ADHD, a new research study connecting one neuron to the next, a cool new methodology or technology to manage our lives. Something that grabs us by our novelty.
But for me and my brain, discovering the new ADHD magic pill of productivity is not where the struggle lies. Everything works if you do it.
My interpretation of the ADHD struggle isn’t in finding a system that works for my brain, it’s in figuring out how to do the work of implementing the system. Any system.
Getting excited about a way something works is how we activate that novelty (or interest) in implementing. Someone says something the right way, or we have some lightning bolt moments in our brain. Typically, this sends us diving in full force and implementing the bejesus out of the new amazing system. Then, upon using up all our mental juice, we crash, some aspect of this glorious system gets missed, and we deem it a failure. Then we deem ourselves a failure. Then we double down on the deeming, we do a double deem, and deem ourselves hopeless. This is not “the way.”
As a black belt in productivity for ADHD, I believe that “the way” is in focusing our efforts on doing a thing even though it feels wrong in the moment. How good can we get at doing shit ‘even though’? These are the moments where we learn about ourselves. These are the moments that we end up feeling extremely good about ourselves when we get on the other end of them.
These moments, however, rarely feel right. They typically register as “not now”. There’s no immediate fire, there might be no novelty, and our brain will seek out something else that feels more right in that moment.
The most effective way I’ve found to be successful with this stuff is to do it in very small increments at first, give it a timeframe, and plan it ahead of time. Never in the moment. Timeframe-wise, instead of “organizing on Wednesday afternoon” it would be “organizing on Wednesday from 3:00-3:45pm.” And there would be a timer set for 45 minutes at 3:00pm.
Just because we can see how brilliant things could we if we do it full force, doesn’t mean that’s the most effective way to do things.
In my experience, we start small. We get consistent with small. Then we add a little more. Then we get consistent with a little more. And we keep going like that until you look back and realize, “holy balls I am more structured than I have ever been in my life, and yet I feel freer, calmer, and like I have more ‘me’ time!” It’s awesome!
To me, that’s the magic of a well managed ADHD life.
It doesn’t happen naturally, unfortunately. How many times do we say “I totally get it” and then nothing happens. It’s not enough to learn a skill. It’s not enough to ‘get it’. As an example: how many people can read about and learn about piano and music theory and then just translate it into playing beautiful music on the piano because they ‘get it’? Nope.
Gotta work on it. Every day. Yes, that includes weekends. For an ADHDer practicing a new skill, why on earth would be NOT do it for two days? We suck at transitions, so why pretend like we can transition in and out of a way of behaving for two days a week and then seamlessly transition back? If that’s an overwhelming thought, keep in mind that’s why we start small.
My challenge to you is to create a very small appointment with yourself every day. Could be as short as 5 minutes. Then, every day at that time, set your timer and work on that thing for the length of the timer. Doesn’t matter what it is, just has to be intentional. And this will give you practice at the art of doing a thing you said you were going to do, when you said you were going to do it.
Start small. Keep working on it. Expand when consistent. Watch your world free up!
Your ADHD Big Bro,
Russ
PS - you can make working on it exponentially more likely to be successful by involving other people. Join ADHDBB and be a part of 60+ adults with ADHD (at the time of this writing) working on it together. If you know all about your ADHD, if you “get it” and still aren’t doing the work, join.